Broken Adolescence

Picture perfect, flawless in every way,

a thousand suns couldn’t shine brighter than you;

but what you say makes me see through

and suddenly it’s like night and day;

now I see it’s more of what you do

and no longer is a pedestal where you stay.

It hurts so much since I never had the chance

to heal from your reckless moods;

always afraid of what I would say or do.

Your anger boiling over at the drop of a hat;

never realizing how much I loved you;

and wondering how if you loved me could do that.

Inside my emotions cry while outside I hide,

like a statue devoid of all that one can perceive.

Not letting you to get the best of me though

barely alive inside while I sadly grieve,

I bid my time when I can finally leave and

wondering why did you even carry me?

Time goes on and it seems like there is no end;

I can’t lie you have your good points

but I can’t go on living in pretend.

You say you love me but I don’t remember those days,

living on your habits it seems it was you I raised;

sometimes the pain is just better to forget.

Try as I may, I can’t live on this way;

though I hoped for the best, it won’t be.

Time for me to leave, for me to be free,

your words no longer carry any weight.

You say you will always loved me;

I loved you, but now it’s too late.

Copyright by NewLife2008

Do You Know a Moon’s Sorrow

Do you know a moon’s sorrow?

When shrouded by brooding clouds

as thunder and lightning cry out

masking the glory of its brilliant light?

Its luminance not even that of a firefly,

nature’s night light hanging in desperation;

desperate for some kind of cooperation

but this night the tempest just won’t comply.

Hours pass without an admiring fixation,

regretfully the satellite resigns and succumbs.

Pushed aside from the cyclic rotation;

swallowed up by the brilliance of the sun.

Copyright by NewLife2008

Cemented Dreams

The window of my soul

peak through vinyl ladders;

sunbeam dreams

keep me mesmerized

though the view

is just out of my reach.

A wistful longing, deep

from within, for what

I don’t even know;

if only the window of

my soul would open up

wouldn’t you know, it’s stuck.

Copyright by NewLife2008

A Stinging Rain

I see you in my memory;

it keeps replaying over and over

and I can’t break away as I keep

coming back to that cold and rainy day.

A water crescendo falling outside of my window,

drowning out the pain I can’t hide

but not the water shed of tears that hit the floor;

all alone as I hear you slam the front door.

The wheels keep turning in my brain

wondering where exactly we went wrong;

seeing you leave in the pouring rain

realizing the love was gone all along.

Running outside in the torrential rain

like a fool hoping against all hope;

praying that you’ll look back and turn around

but inside I know I’ll never see you again.

I’m wet, cold, and chilled to the bone

I don’t want to go inside, but I can’t stay here

in the middle of the road –  but you’re not

coming back – this much is clear.

Rainy days leave me feeling melancholy;

it takes me back every now and again

when I hear the patter on my window pane,

I painfully realize I no longer have anybody.

Copyright by NewLife2008

Color Negative

Looking out among the waves of doubt,

I try to muster up optimism but

I’m swallowed up by a sea of uncertainty;

wave after wave it’s seems relentless

and it feels like I’m drowning.

It seems my joyous outlook has been broken;

never did I think I would have ever succumbed,

but I’m older now and with it creeps self doubt.

Even though wiser, this world is more unstable

and because of it, so has become my life.

Even the simple things of life seem out of my reach;

I know they’re out there but no longer seem attainable.

The sun reminds me of my past happiness and

every day I live reminds me of how far removed I am

from it and the shaky ground my life is on.

Life is so beautiful and at the same time so cruel;

I know this isn’t what life is supposed to be but if you

live long enough you will be a victor and a victim.

So if I end up with nothing at the end, despite my faith,

I know in the end I will have conquered everything.

Copyright be NewLife2008

You

I'm going to love you more than anyone else,

I'm going to love you even when you're not yourself.

All your hopes and fears sweetheart we'll conquer together

don't say a thing, just lay your head on my chest;

give yourself to me and I'll take care of the rest.

You are the source of my joy, you light my fire within,

you are the life I breathe and you make me whole again.

When I'm down I'm not there for long,

because you fortify me with your gentle reasonings;

your melodious tones are like a song

soothing my soul with your soulful seasonings.

What more can I do, I just want to be your everything;

you touch me without touching me at all

affecting my very being, I'll never be the same;

you are in my heart no matter how near or how far.

So just let me say this just one more time;

I'm going to love you more than anyone else,

I'm going to love you even when you're not yourself.

All your hopes and fears we'll conquer together

don't say a thing, just lay your head on my chest;

give yourself to me and I'll take care of the rest.

Copyright by NewLife2008

Sweet Addiction

You deceived me to my own detriment;

though oh such a sweet odor, I couldn't resist.

Consumed by blinded passion I'm immersed

in to feelings of euphoria waiting for my misery.

Time stands still or is it just my denial?

The former of I’m convinced until I’m betrayed

by the stinging chill of rejection that hits like a tsunami

and I’m floored as I feel the power of your rejection.

You mock me and I’m nothing but helpless

though you always lead me on thinking it will

be different; but again I agonize on why I

always let you get the best of me.

Oh the addiction that you are to me!

It seems I can’t break free from your salacious

appeal – but I can no longer indulge for you

betray me every single time – this is goodbye.

Cold turkey is my only salvation; I can’t

bring myself to indulge though thoughts

of you make me salivate – out of my life

forever and for me no more sleepless nights.

Copyright by NewLife2008